Friday 26 August 2016

Olympic moment in time




GOAL: I am learning to use language features to add to the meaning of my writing e.g., similes, alliteration, onomatopoeia
Jemma moment in time.
My hand has just landed on the mat then the other, I’m starting to sweat my feet have just landed no now I'm on the
beat board I fling off onto the tongue and I’m now backflipping off the tongue as if i was performing a stunt in the circus! SMACK I landed and it was an amazing landing it was all perfect!
But I wonder what others would think?

2 comments:

  1. Hi Jemma,I like how you used Onomatopoeia in your writing.
    Next step is to use comma's to split the ideas.
    By Abbie

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for your positive, thoughtful, helpful comment.